Just because it didn't come as expected doesn't mean its not what you wanted
People, be mindful that the opportunity of a lifetime may present itself in an unusual and strange way. Always keep an open mind and remember the saying: There is more than one way to skin a cat. Don't let something great pass you by being simple minded and ignorant.
There may be something or some things that you want to happen in your life but you are too stuck in your way of thinking to see it coming to you. When praying for the things that you want, be sure to ask God to open your mind up to accept it in an unusual way simply because you just never know how an opportunity will present itself.
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Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Should Women Pursue Men?
How should this be done
A series of events lead me to wonder if men like to be pursued by women. Before I go any further remember we are in the year 2009. Almost nothing is traditional anymore. I had conversations with friends about this and actually asked a few guys their opinion. I was very surprised at the response.
This is one of those topics that can be debatable for women because so many of us have gotten relaxed at the thought and the habit of men approaching us. We have figured out how we like to be approach, what this guy should say and/or do to get our attention. We even know how we want guys to look at us. We've grown accustom to thinking all we have to do is look pretty and they will come.
I am proud to say that I will be thirty soon and very proud of it because of all the things that I have learned in my life. I would not rather be younger nor do I wish to be anything like anyone else. I think I have fallen in love with myself. This love for myself has also brought on direction in different areas of my life. I now know what it is that I want, especially in a relationship. So I have to be willing to sometimes go after a man that may be what I am looking for.
So back to the question. Should women pursue men? I think the answer is yes. I would also say that there is an art to it. Men are rarely approached by women and surely don't get the flowers or the chocolates that we look forward to. As mentioned before, I did question a few men and their first two answers were the same. They all like the idea of women showing their interest. It tells them that woman is confident and confidence is sexy to a man. The question was how did they want to be approached or what could a woman do to turn them on initially. The response was " I don't know". This was very surprising because they realized this was something they had never given thought to. These guys were clueless. They had never been asked this question before.
From all the information I gathered I realized there is an art to this. We do know that all men aren't the same so the approach has to be different. There are a couple rules that are the same no matter what. The first one is you don't just walk up to a guy and say let me get your number or whats up for the night. A guy does not want to be man handled! Although it feels good to flip the script sometimes so they can see how it feels. Initial contact is not the time for that. Save it for when he has earned it. The second is be sexy without being sexual. There is a difference.
We know the ratio of women to men (in Atlanta) is like 20:1 or something like that, so just think even with those numbers, how many don't work out and the many ways you can set yourself apart from other women. Bottom line is to not be afraid to make the first move or the second but leave the third up to him and if you aren't quite there yet with the approach then just give him the eye (without being stalkerish) til he notices and be approachable. Compliment him and show genuine interest. Somehow it will all come together if its suppose to.
Comments, suggestions, questions? Shoot me an email freshholmes@yahoo.com
A series of events lead me to wonder if men like to be pursued by women. Before I go any further remember we are in the year 2009. Almost nothing is traditional anymore. I had conversations with friends about this and actually asked a few guys their opinion. I was very surprised at the response.
This is one of those topics that can be debatable for women because so many of us have gotten relaxed at the thought and the habit of men approaching us. We have figured out how we like to be approach, what this guy should say and/or do to get our attention. We even know how we want guys to look at us. We've grown accustom to thinking all we have to do is look pretty and they will come.
I am proud to say that I will be thirty soon and very proud of it because of all the things that I have learned in my life. I would not rather be younger nor do I wish to be anything like anyone else. I think I have fallen in love with myself. This love for myself has also brought on direction in different areas of my life. I now know what it is that I want, especially in a relationship. So I have to be willing to sometimes go after a man that may be what I am looking for.
So back to the question. Should women pursue men? I think the answer is yes. I would also say that there is an art to it. Men are rarely approached by women and surely don't get the flowers or the chocolates that we look forward to. As mentioned before, I did question a few men and their first two answers were the same. They all like the idea of women showing their interest. It tells them that woman is confident and confidence is sexy to a man. The question was how did they want to be approached or what could a woman do to turn them on initially. The response was " I don't know". This was very surprising because they realized this was something they had never given thought to. These guys were clueless. They had never been asked this question before.
From all the information I gathered I realized there is an art to this. We do know that all men aren't the same so the approach has to be different. There are a couple rules that are the same no matter what. The first one is you don't just walk up to a guy and say let me get your number or whats up for the night. A guy does not want to be man handled! Although it feels good to flip the script sometimes so they can see how it feels. Initial contact is not the time for that. Save it for when he has earned it. The second is be sexy without being sexual. There is a difference.
We know the ratio of women to men (in Atlanta) is like 20:1 or something like that, so just think even with those numbers, how many don't work out and the many ways you can set yourself apart from other women. Bottom line is to not be afraid to make the first move or the second but leave the third up to him and if you aren't quite there yet with the approach then just give him the eye (without being stalkerish) til he notices and be approachable. Compliment him and show genuine interest. Somehow it will all come together if its suppose to.
Comments, suggestions, questions? Shoot me an email freshholmes@yahoo.com
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